Rendition
by Noah of Literature
Summary: You might not see Stridercest the same after this. ALPHA timeline in highschool! In hiding! Love! Cosplay! Awkwardness! Drama! Idea behind it all: Dave is Dirk's son! Don't burn too bad!


_**OWNS NOTHING! Enjoy! Try not to burn TOO bad!**_

* * *

><p>I knock on the door, curious as to why the principal wanted to see me so randomly, but staying in character. As President of the Cosplay Club, I am expected to be one Hell of a Sebastian.<p>

"Come in!" The deep, baritone voice of the principal reaches me and I open the door.

I almost swoon when I see who's inside._** The entire Homestuck Alpha timeline!**_ Keep calm, Lucy. Be Sebastian.

"You summoned me, Sir?" I ask in a calm, cool way, bowing like Sebastian would to Ciel (who is mostly likely running around the school somewhere, dragged along by Alois). I keep my voice in a perfect, smooth male tenor.

"Lucy, this entire group is new here. I promised their guardians that you would help them out." Principal Enciso, a five-foot-eight, swimmer-built Hondurian with a Ph.D. in performing arts explains. I nod, looking to the group on my left he's gesturing to. Kankri and the other dancestors along with Dirk, Jake, Roxy, and Jane sit there. On my right are the Ancestors and the Alpha Dave, John, Rose, and Jade. _'Deep breaths, Lucy.'_

I turn to the ancestors, bowing as a butler should. "Rest assured, good Sirs and Ladies, that your children are in the utmost capable hands." I speak humbly.

"Now, Lucy, there are a few things you should know-" Mr. Enciso begins.

"Kurloz is mute, Meulin is deaf, Damara only speaks Japanese, and Mituna is mentally handicapped." I finish for him. He blinks in surprise, as does everyone else.

"So what makes you think you're qualified to take charge of our kids?" a low, rumbling growl makes me turn to face the GHB. I give a small smile, opening my mouth to assure the man, but Mr. Enciso beats me to it.

"Miss Swords is the best student in the history of Clio Academy. She is valedictorian and Class President of her class. She's on my personal student advisory board, Historian of our Student Council, President of the Cosplay Club, even a well-decorated officer in our NJROTC. And that's just in school." He pauses for a moment. When no one speaks, he continues, much to my embarrassment. "She's a world-wide martial artist, a medically CERT certified personnel, and the bet volunteer any community could want." Wow, he sounds very indignant now. I totally just wish the floor would open up and swallow me whole.

"It's fine, Mr. Enciso." I speak finally, surprised at how calm and a bit curt I sound. I allow a small smile to cross my face. "I'm sure he's just worrying a few **_bucket_**-fulls." I assure the principal, still calm. He nods in understanding, the only one in the room who isn't affected in some way by my choice of wording.

"Well, I'm sure that Lucy here has everything under control." he looks at me. "They do, for the most part, have the same schedules as each other. I've had them put into the same lunches as you." he informs me, handing me their schedules. Then he looks at the new students. "You may follow Miss Swords to your classes now." He turns to the adults. "I would like to go over a few more things with you, if it's fine."

I file out last of all the noobs. "Please allow me to introduce myself. I am Lucy Saphira Swords, but right now I'm cosplaying as Sebastian Michaelis." I speak as I go through the group,handing them their papers. "You all have classes close to each other, so that's good. And I'm not far away. If you have any problems, or need anything, just ask a teacher to call for me. I really only have four classes, so don't feel guilty about asking me to come over." I give Sebastian's winning smile. "I do believe a tour is in order, no?" I ask, a little mischievously. "I'm sure class can wait a little longer."

* * *

><p>Lunch rolls around and I find a few of them standing in a corner awkwardly. I approach Kankri, Mituna, Meulin, and Kurloz. "Come on." I motion for them to follow with my tray. We all sit at a large circle table. Within minutes, all sixteen are here. They talk and laugh together, seeming to forget where they are. I watch such closeness and comraderie with a small smile.<p>

"I figured I would find you here,_ Michaelis_." a cold voice comes from behind me. I turn to see Claude glowering at me spitefully.

I smile easily. "Come now, Faustus." I lean back, relaxed. "Can we not release old grudges? Ciel went off on his own a few centuries ago." I look at my black nails lazily.

Some guy walks up to me, looking flustered. Purple gills hang horribly from his neck. "Lu-er, Sebastian, I-I can't get these to stay or look natural." he looks kind of embarrassed.

"Excuse me, Faustus." I nod to the spider and walk over to Jordan, who will be cosplaying as... Cronus Ampora... next week... My eyes widen a bit as I remember next week's cosplay theme._ 'Oh, shit!'_

"Here." I have him hold the hand mirror to where he can see what I'm doing. "Move your neck, and I'll cull you." I speak sweetly, casually, but the threat is very real.

I carefully apply the glue, not waiting very long before dabbing the putty around the edges. Letting it dry, I repeat the process on the other side. "Practice speaking." I instruct calmly.

"Damn, do I have to?" he speaks like Cronus as I smooth the mostly-dry putty. "Good. Now, who's your Matesprit?" I ask calmly, applying purple eyeshadow on the putty and fading it into his skin.

"Heh. Kankri." he answers in a smug purr. I nod in approval. "Done." I announce. He blinks at the mirror. "Holy shit! They look so real!" he gasps.

"Yes, yes. Run along now." I gently shoo him away before turning back to Claude. "Terribly sorry, Faustus. You know how being so responsible is- or, at least I would hope so." I give a smug smirk.

His jaw clenches. "One shouldn't speak of responsibility so freely, considering you have left your post at your Master's side." he hisses angrily.

"Says the one who was looking to steal another's prey while ignoring his own charge." I reply coolly.

"Claude, stop it!" a high-pitched, snobbish voice reaches us. "That's enough, Sebastian." A calmer, more condescending voice follows.

Both of us turn to our respectful masters. "Young Master." I greet Ciel as Claude announces, "Your Highness."

"Ciel, why are they fighting over you again?" Alois pouts, stamping his foot. "Probably for some trivial and stupid reason." Ciel sighs like he has a headache. The brunette walks over to me and grabs my tie, pulling me down to his eye level. "What do you think you're doing?" he asks in a low, dark voice.

"No fair! Why is everyone talking with Sebastian?! Claude, I order you to fight Sebastian!" Alois yells.

Claude strikes, but we're not in that spot. I hand a cradled Ciel to the closest person, who happens to be Dirk. With that, I turn and leap into action.

We're everywhere, throwing cutlery, food, and performing some carefully choreographed hand-to-hand combat.

We end when I throw him into the fountain in the middle of the cafeteria. Everyone around me cheers.

I return to the Alphas and Ciel. "I humbly apologize for that display, My Lord. I admit, it wasn't my best." I kiss his hand as I sit.

"Oh never mind." he waves my apology off before climbing into my lap and I wrap my arms around his waist.

"Are you two together?!" Jake asks incredulously.

"What an idiotic thing to ask." Ciel answers flatly, eating his lunch. I chuckle. "What my Master means is; as a normal couple of students who attend this school as well as the anime of which we're cosplaying, no we are not. But we deemed the pairing for our cosplay." I explain Sebastian style.

Ciel looks at the sixteen others around us, then at me. "Are they a part of next week? They look a lot like the Alphas." he comments casually.

I chuckle again. "No, Young Master. They just started here today." I answer calmly.

"A pity." Ciel murmurs, not caring anymore.

"Er, Lucy?" I turn my head to Porrim. "What's a period?" she inquires curiously, a paper in front of her. _'She must have Health...'_

I blink once. "A period is the human equivalent of being in heat. Although personally, I think it's much worse." I begin nonchalantly, ignoring the discomfort of the males around us...

* * *

><p>I sigh as I get back to me and my sister's house. Our dad had died overseas and mom is the Chief Spokesperson for GE Energy, so she's gone most of the time. We only ever see her on Christmas and maybe a random point or two in the year.<p>

Knowing my sister won't be home for another two hours, I wander into the living room.

I'm just settling down when my cellphone rings. "Yello?" I answer the unrecognized number in my Texan drawl.

_"Lucy?"_ Cronus' voice comes from the other side.

"Howdy, Cro. Is there a problem?" I inquire politely.

_"Er, yeah... Tuna! ...** ACK!**"_ There's a lot of scuffling on the other end, then the phone cuts off. I smirk to myself at their antics.

As expected, my sister Dawn and her boyfriend Riley (who also lives in our five-bedroom house) return just as I'm setting the last of the food on the table, some country music playing softly from the radio in the corner. We sit eat, and talk about our day.

"So... the Homestuck Alphas now attend my school." I speak carefully.

Both junior high students freeze. "Y-you mean... Cronus and Horuss?" Dawn practically bounces with excitement. I nod slowly and her bouncing doubles in happiness. Riley looks like he's not sure whether to be as excited or be terrified. "And the sad part is that next week is our Homestuck cosplay." I add glumly.

Dawn and Riley burst into laughter at my predicament. I scowl at them half-heartedly.


End file.
